Goodbye Summer, Goodbye Festivals: Why I HATE Them.

I love the idea of festivals, but the moment I get there I feel the dread approaching... like "OH SHIT. WHAT HAVE I DONE!" So this is a post to celebrate the end of summer, and something to look back on... so please send me this post in spring when I am saying how much I want to go to T, because I stupidly forget... every single year I forget... so here are all the things I HATE about festivals, how much I do not want to go to another one EVER again. (Please remind me lol)




1. The Queue 
Queues everywhere, to pee, to get something to eat, to get in and be fondled by some security guard... I just cannot handle the waiting. Especially when it is waiting for something so unexciting... like a blue portaloo. Thrilling.

2. What People Wear
For some reason at festivals girls see it as the perfect excuse to just not bother with clothes. Why do girls have the overwhelming urge to wear so little at gigs, if it isn't acceptable to wear to Tesco, you shouldn't be wearing it in a field of strangers. FYI... I am all for people wearing what they want... but I do not want to see mens bare bellies, or girls bums hanging out way too short/small pants (yes I am calling them pants, cause they definitely are not shorts)

3. Plastic Cups, no lids and £6 pints
Oh you want a bottle of water? Here is one without the lid, because somehow a lid is a weapon, or something we are not allowed.. or better yet you don't even get the bottle, you get a plastic cup.. great. £4 for a cup of water... or better yet get yourself a £6 pint in a plastic cup which will be flat as a pancake. Drinking SUCKS at festivals, its just so expensive.... which leads onto....

4. Drunk People
So by this point I have stopped drinking, I mean I do not like paying that much for one drink, yet somehow everyone else seems to be ok with it... drunk people... drunk people EVERYWHERE. Seriously they are SO annoying, falling about all over the place, trying to speak to me and feeling like they need to be an inch away from my face... falling on me, just around being annoying.. while screaming THIS IS AWESOME. No.

5. Drugs
I have no issue with drugs, I just don't want people being off their faces around me, because people on drugs make drunk people look tame. You want to have a good time? great, bash on... just don't ruin my time by being so obnoxious and touching me, stroking my hair/face or collapsing at my feet. Next time you think you are so awesome taking them, stay sober one night and see how much of a twat you look... What what annoys me even further is drug use is typically done in the portaloos... yup lads, we all know why you are queuing rather than peeing against the fence, and trust me there is NOTHING sexy about snorting anything off a manky toilet seat.

6. Standing
Before anyone is even on my feet are starting to ache, why doesn't everyone just sit down? would that not just be 10x more fun??? Well it would for me!

What short people can see:

7. Not Being Able To See
Anyone who is short will feel my pain here, I can never see anything at a standing gig. I be as well putting myself in a cupboard and turn the music up loud for a few hours... Cause I can see about the same amount.

8. Phone Reception
So you are dealing with all this, you take out your phone and think HEY i'll snapchat! No. Everything Everywhere you say EE? well it turns our you should be called "nothing if you are all together in one place, even though we say 3G, it means NOTHING" Doesn't have the same ring to it....

9. Weather
So I think people in Scotland forget the rain, or we think it's FINE ill wear my wellies... it isn't fine, you are soaked, always. I am yet to see a T in the Park where it doesn't rain once.

10. Getting Home
So you have survived it all, YAY! Time to go home.. oh wait.... everywhere is gridlocked... no taxi, no nothing... just a lot of waiting... last time took me 3 hours. NOT FUN.

So now I have made myself look like a total Grandmother with all my complaining I will leave it there, do you agree? or do you love them? let me know in the comments below!

FYI, I would totally go to a concert if they had camping chairs, bring your own bottle, and a no getting off your face rule... oh and it would SO be Adele on, she would love it.